WAAAGH! The Science of an Ork Rush
By Salazar, the Ancient Red Dragon and content creator at Bastion Games
Ah, Orks! The most boisterous, unpredictable, and delightfully destructive force in all of Warhammer 40K. Mere mortals may see them as mindless hordes, bumbling across the battlefield in a drunken frenzy of violence, but I—being infinitely more perceptive—see a carefully engineered force of nature.
Yes, dear readers, the Ork Rush is not just stupidly fun—it is science. And today, I shall enlighten you on why these green-skinned brutes are the most statistically absurd, probability-defying, and hilariously effective army in the grimdark future.
Step 1: The Mathematical Madness of the WAAAGH!
For the uninitiated, an Ork Rush consists of one simple principle: throw an ungodly amount of Orks at the enemy and see what survives.
- Your average Ork Boy has a WS of 3+, meaning he will hit 2 out of 3 times in close combat.
- With a Strength of 4, he wounds most infantry on a 4+, meaning half of those hits go through.
- AP is low, but who cares? You're rolling dice in bulk.
- Squad sizes are massive (20-30 models), meaning attrition is their enemy’s problem.
In essence, Ork math boils down to this: Make 100 attacks. Who cares if only 40% succeed? You’re still rolling more dice than your opponent has models.
Step 2: The Psychological Warfare of Green Enthusiasm
Orks don’t just play the game—they play you.
- They break your opponent’s resolve by flooding the board with an overwhelming number of models.
- They force engagement—your opponent has to respond to the wave of green.
- They capitalize on momentum—once Orks gain an advantage, they become unstoppable.
And let’s be honest, rolling that many dice is just plain fun. Even when Orks lose, they lose spectacularly—explosions, wild melee, and a glorious mess of tabletop carnage.
Step 3: The “If We Believe It Works, It Works” Rule
One of the most beautiful elements of Ork science is their reality-bending belief system.
Orks do not merely roll dice—they will them to succeed.
- Red ones go faster. (Because Orks believe they do.)
- Biggest Ork is the boss. (Because Orks believe he is.)
- More Dakka = more kills. (Because Orks believe bullets will hit.)
Step 4: How to Counter an Ork Rush (Good Luck with That)
If you find yourself facing the Green Tide, here are your best (though likely futile) options:
- Mass Firepower: Kill them faster than they can reach you.
- Blast & Flamers: Weapons that hit multiple models at once are essential.
- Movement Control: Terrain, chokes, and charge distance manipulation can slow their advance.
- High AP, Low Volume: Do not try to trade blows—cut them down before they get to you.
But let’s be honest—no plan survives first contact with a horde of screaming, axe-wielding lunatics. You will lose models. You will watch an endless tide of Orks hurl themselves at your front lines with reckless abandon.
And worst of all? You will find yourself laughing along with them.
Final Thoughts: Join the Green Tide or Be Crushed By It
The Ork Rush is chaos incarnate—a battlefield philosophy that states:
- “Enough bodies will solve any problem.”
- “Victory is secondary to fun.”
- “Dakka, dakka, dakka.”
For those who play Orks, the joy is not merely in winning—it is in creating the wildest, most unpredictable, and undeniably entertaining moments possible.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment with a particularly belligerent Warboss who insists his ‘Trukk goes fasta than my wings.’
Hmph. We shall see about that.
- Salazar, Ancient Red Dragon & Tactical Genius
